I may have previously mentioned how badly the early phase of pregnancy affects me. I may have mentioned it a lot. But really, I don’t actually think I know many people who have had the unfortunate experience of dealing with the extreme morning sickness that I have, and darn it, I’m just so jealous of those people.
The sole purpose for this particular blog post is that I don’t forget this feeling. My memory is rubbish, I can watch a movie and not be able to tell you what it was about the very next day. I vaguely remember how bad my morning sickness was with Riya, oh, and the little side effect that it lasted THE FULL 9 MONTHS! So I really don’t want to forget again when we consider having baby 4. (I know I said I won’t do it, but I can promise you we will consider it a lot) I am feeling very, very privileged to be pregnant again and I am trying very hard not to take it for granted, but after feeling like this for the last 8 weeks, I am starting to feel a bit over it. Not the baby, just the pregnancy.
So back to you, Morning Sickness. Or should I say Every Waking Moment Sickness. Yes, I caught you out on your ridiculous name! I freaking hate you, and I’m not ashamed to say it.
- I hate that I constantly feel car sick, whether I’m moving or not. All. Flipping. Day.
- I hate that I can’t eat my fav meal of all time (bacon and eggs) without feeling like I’m about to vomit all over myself.
- I hate that I crave lovely foods to the point of tasting the deliciousness, but when I get it I can’t eat it. Or I eat it and face the consequences. Which really suck.
- I hate that I feel like I’m not feeding this poor tiny little baby because all I manage to get down besides a few odd proper meals is marg on toast.
- I hate that I am starting to hate toast. I mean really, who hates toast!?!?
- I hate that when I enter a building, I make sure to locate the toilet so that I know where to run if the need arises.
- I hate that I feel so grim that I need to resort to watching TV or painting to make it through the afternoon with the girls.
- I hate that I have to miss out on things because I just feel so weak or sick that I can’t participate.
- I hate how, although they try, no one really understands this feeling unless they have been there themselves.
- I hate that when my child is sick, it takes every little bit of my self control not to vomit on top of her when she vomits.
All that being said. I am actually kind of thankful. Yes, you heard me. Thankful. I am a worrier of notable proportions. And even with the constant, persistent sickness, I still sometimes think it’s not real. If I didn’t have this sickness to remind me that it was “all going well” in there, I would probably be freaking out all the time.
Looking forward to meeting you little baby, all of this is definitely worth it!